What is left when strength fades and titles no longer matter? Fr. Rafa Castillo, OAR, shares with us a profound and endearing reflection on the little things that give meaning to the life of the older friars: silent gestures, discreet care and a faith that is strengthened in the simple.
Big things begin – and end – in the small things.
As I consider this year’smotto-“If you aspire to great things, start small”-Ithink of the elderly or sick brothers and sisters in my community. And words come to mind that could complete that sentence:
“…and those big things you achieved in life will remain in you as the memory that will fill you with great satisfaction, while you face new small, simple, but no less important things”.
Being oneself before God
One of those new “little things” that our older friars learn to consider is to simply be themselves before God, leaving behind the roles of pastors, teachers, directors or superiors.leaving behind the roles of parish priests, teachers, directors or superiors. What a simple thing, but so liberating: to stand before the God who created me, knows me, has called me, loves me, accompanies me… and waits for me.
And what better than to live this stage in community, in an environment that promotes the freedom of the children of God, where religious duties are fulfilled as far as strength allows, without the demands of youth and good health.
The daily miracle
Another “little thing” in the houses of friars is the miracle of each new day. miracle of each new day. Sometimes, during the prayers, we notice that the friar who always arrives first at the chapel is missing. Then, the person in charge becomes restless, unable to concentrate… until the slow shuffling of his espadrilles is heard. That sound becomes a source of relief, joy and gratitude to God.
Caring with tenderness and humor
Brother caregivers also have their hidden gestures of love. For example, they prepare the breviaries in advance for those who have memory problems, placing the ribbons on the correct pages. Then, during prayer, they discreetly whisper to them, “Yellow…green…blue…back to green.” Nothing so rewarding as sparing a sibling a moment of frustration at not finding his or her place.
And when you manage to gain the trust of an older friar, he becomes your “accomplice”, especially in not following medical indications to the letter. As one said to me:
“The doctors want us to live forever. They do not understand that we friars exist for the people of God. And when we can no longer serve the people, we are only for God, in whom we wish to rest.”
That’s why there are no soup inspectors or sugar hounds in this house. Here we also celebrate life with a glass of wine or a sweet dessert. Because that is also caring with humanity.
Loving patience
Another of our tasks as caregivers is to cultivate patience in the community. It’s easy to get caught up in so-and-so’s noises or so-and-so’s gestures. But impatience does not change reality. Holiness is achieved through little things: letting others be, accepting that they are no longer the same as they were, and practicing “loving patience” with older brothers and sisters. 
Grateful admiration
A fundamental attitude in these communities is the ability to admire with gratitude and admire with gratitude. I entered the Order when everything was already built, how could I not admire these brothers who gave everything? What less than to show respect with patience, care and affection. Encourage them to continue to preside at Mass, even if they need someone to turn the pages of the missal or point to their place. No, we cannot be overcome by despair.
The last “little thing”
In conclusion, I cannot fail to mention the last “little thing” that we friars do to attain the eternal: die.
So simple, humble and silent is that moment when we surrender our soul to our Creator. What we feared so much when we had great aspirations becomes the final step towards the eternal embrace of the Father, who reveals Himself as the greatest and most precious aspiration.